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Somebody Stop Me!


A cop who is so ugly he can't get a date kills women who turn him down.



Air Dates

  • First Run - October 22, 1976
  • Repeat - February 1, 1977





74     10

5 Responses to Episode 0540

Starts out with very poor sound quality, but improves at the 2 minute mark. When beautiful women start to be murdered, two cops confess to each other that they are the killer, and both truly believe they are! But who will be found guilty and will justice be served? Story idea was interesting, but I didn't find the ending very satisfying. I would have liked a bit more of a twist or something not quite so sniveling and pathetic out of the guilty party.


Thank you so much for making this site possible. I can't imagine all the hard work that went in to it. I started to make cassettes of it myself back around 1985 or so. WHAM radio (that played it first run) ran a scant few episodes late in the summer. I only got four episodes in (the last being "Roses Are For Funerals") and then it went off the air. Just my luck.


Two policemen — Bert, the unattractive but sincere one, and Charlie, the handsome-but-married one — think Inez is the prettiest woman they have ever seen. But when she refuses a date with Bert, saying he is homely, Bert makes sure she never sees his face again — he kills her. Finally, after murdering several other pretty women who turn down his invitations, Bert confesses to Charlie, the officer assigned to the case. But Charlie, who already has a suspect, doesn’t believe him.


This has such a 1940s feel to the dialogue and setting to me. Bert, played by Joe Silva, is the desperate desk clerk/officer that has no luck with the ladies. His friend Charlie is just the opposite: a married beat cop who's always on the prowl for a good time. Then Bert finally can't take rejection any longer to his frankly pushy and creepy advances and the trouble begins. Silva plays Bert well, Larry Haines also shines as a sexist cop. Some of the dialogue is a little farfetched but episode is worth a listen as the characters keep the plot moving along. 3 out of 5 stars.


This episode was just… dull. It didn’t go anywhere and it took an hour to get there. Not Sam Dann’s finest hour.


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